People with eating disorders are often misunderstood and unfairly stigmatized. Labeled as ‘control freaks’ or perceived as individuals with an inherent controlling personality type, the complexity of their struggle is often overlooked. It’s essential to dispel these misconceptions and provide a more nuanced understanding of what is really going on.

People with eating disorders have often had their agency and/or bodily autonomy taken from them. This deprivation can occur in various forms – it can be interpersonal or systemic, or, in many cases, both. This loss of agency and bodily autonomy can lead to a feeling of losing one’s sense of self, creating an environment where both the body and mind begin to feel unsafe.

Over time, this loss of safety and self can be profoundly destabilizing and traumatic. Eating disorders can emerge as a coping mechanism, a way for individuals to reclaim some sense of agency amid their perceived chaos. They can provide a pseudo sense of safety in an unjust world, a semblance of control when everything else seems out of hand.

Understanding this, it becomes clear that treatment and support shouldn’t focus on the supposed control issues of the individual. Instead, the emphasis should be on understanding their quest for safety – physical, emotional, psychological, and systemic – and helping them find it in healthier, more sustainable ways.

It’s crucial for providers to see the longing for safety their clients are understandably trying to find. They must strive to help them restore safety and agency through secure relationships, community with shared social identities, and access to resources. This approach recognizes the individual’s struggle and respects their journey, creating a supportive environment that can facilitate healing and recovery.

So, let’s shift the narrative around eating disorders. Let’s stop making it about an inherent controlling personality type and focus instead on the individual’s longing for safety and the
restoration of their agency. By doing so, we can provide more empathetic, effective support to those battling eating disorders and contribute to a more understanding, inclusive society.

If you are currently struggling and located in CA, Utah or Florida, we would love to support your recovery journey. Please click here to set up a free consultation to see if we’d be a fit for you!